Weeding the Web

Presents for gardeners: 20% discount on Punch cartoons

As you may have spotted over the years, I'm a pushover for a good cartoon. I've even commissioned one as a present for Husband. You can't get much better, though, than many that appeared in Punch over the decades. Some of the very best cartoonists of their day contributed, including one of my favourites, Thelwell.

The Allotment, by Thelwell. Published in "Punch" May 1954. Reproduced with permission of Punch Ltd., www.punch.co.uk

This one makes me laugh every time. It's the total oblivion of the sunbather to the glowering looks of his fellow allotmenteers that does it. Thelwell had a real feel for gardeners, as he showed in Up the Garden Path, a book that arrived in my Christmas stocking some time in my childhood.

Speaking of Christmas, wouldn't a gardening cartoon make a super present? (I wouldn't mention it, but I know that visitors are already arriving at Weeding the Web via "Christmas" searches.)

That being so, I'm really pleased to be able to offer a 20% discount on all Punch print products with the code at the bottom of the page.  There are plenty of gardening subjects to choose from (click on the picture above to go straight through to that).  All the images are available as archival quality prints on good quality, thick textured paper and are giclée printed. You could even go the whole hog and go for ready-to-hang canvases or acrylic prints.

The discount is available on all print products, even if (gasp!) you find a cartoon you'd like with a different subject matter.

Just enter the code NOVEMBER when asked for a coupon code in your shopping cart. The offer continues until November 30th, and I'll post a couple of reminders before then, which will also give us the chance to chortle over the gentle humour of a couple more cartoonists.

 

 

 

Growing Victory in the World Wars

With all the grim stories of WW1 being told at the moment, it's a relief to come across the  Infographic below that looks at a different aspect of life during the two World Wars.

It's always difficult to crowbar a full picture into this type of artwork, so I've added a few comments at the bottom. 

I'll just balance the paragraph about the soldiers' food having gone off with something I've read recently in the fascinating book about WW1, Mud, Blood and Poppycock by military historian and ex-soldier, Gordon Corrigan.

British commanders knew that, while an army mught not exactly march on its stomach, in the Napoleonic sense, men who were hungry or whose food intake lacked the ingredients essential to good health would not fight as well as men who were well fed. A balanced diet was provided, and the administrative staff took great pains to ensure that it was delivered.

A daily ration for British soldiers (note, not French - their rations were so bad that they contributed to the French army's 1917 mutinies) included:

• 18oz fresh or frozen meat
• 16oz preserved meat
• 18oz bread
• 12oz biscuit
• 4oz bacon
• 3oz cheese
• 8oz of fresh vegetables
• 2oz dried vegetables

The preserved meat was an alternative to the fresh/frozen, the biscuit was an alternative to bread, the dried veg an alternative to fresh. Gordon Corrigan adds:

Soldiers rarely went hungry except in the most extreme circumstances, such as the chaos of First Ypres of the withdrawal of spring 1918. Soldiers did not complain about the lack of food, although they did complain about its monotony.

It's not surprising If not everything worked well; it was an unprecedented situation. I think we can be proud of the national response to the need to feed ourselves.  For more about life on the land in WW2, see my review of the recently reprinted Land Girl, A Manual for Volunteers.

The Big Allotment Challenge - what would you have done?

So, it's over. The Big Allotment Challenge, the programme that, according to editor of Horticulture Week, Matthew Appleby, the industry hoped would create a "boom time" for gardening in the manner of Ground Force. It ain't going to happen, is it?

If you're like me, you really wanted - expected - to like this programme. So I felt considerable pain two weeks ago when I turned to Husband and admitted, "This is really boring, isn't it?" Last week, it fell second choice to a Rockford Files episode on DVD, and on Tuesday to The Odd Couple. (For a couple of media opinions see The Guardian and their gardening blog.)

But I watched last night's final with an analytical eye. It was meant to be another Bake-Off - what happened?  Here's my take. I'd love to hear your opinion.

Why the Great British Bake-Off works and The Big Allotment Challenge Doesn't

• GBBO has a great team of judges with expertise in the same subject. BAC lacks the spark of disagreement between experts.
• Individuals competing. Unexpectedly, teams seemed to dilute impact, rather than double it. GBBO builds relationships between presenters and competitors. BAC faces teams of two, which are a subtly more self-contained unit.
• GBBO is active at every stage of development. It makes you feel that you might just have a go at that choux pastry, now that you've seen it made and had it explained. BAC makes very passive watching; I'd be surprised if any non-gardening viewers (were there any by the end?) felt the urge to leap outside and stick seeds in the ground at any time in the last six weeks.
• Time jeopardy. The GBBO contestants always seem to be up against the clock, whether that's clever editing or not. The BAC can't replicate this - the best it seemed to manage was an over-ripe melon a week in advance. Result? Disappointment, not tension.
• Repetition. Whereas GBBO manages to ring the changes each week for those interested in baking, BAC presented just more of the same, even for gardeners. Why the fascination with pickles? And aren't there other things to do with flowers than arrange them?

Will The Big Allotment Challenge return? Possibly, but surely with a different format. Here are my ideas on making it more interesting:

1. Don't get rid of contestants - make it a competition based on points built up during the series (actually this isn't my idea. I found it on another blog but I've forgotten which. If it's yours, let me know and I'll put in a link.)
2. Sell flowers. Send the competitors to a local market with bunches they've grown and see who makes the most money.
3. Have a Generation Game-type challenge. Jonathan Moseley could create something tricky and competitors have to copy it in two minutes.
4. Grow to show a modern variety and a heritage variety of a certain veg. The comparison should be educational.
5. Build a support for climbing peas in half an hour, and let's see if it stands up to their weight during the season.
6. Grow the topping for your own pizza - show imagination. Honestly, if I'd seen Thane Prince pop a teaspoon of mush in her chops one more time, I think I'd have squealed.

I could go on (note to producers: Feel free to ask) but I bet you can think of a few challenges yourself. What would you like to see on The Great Allotment Challenge? Or did you like it just as it was?

 And here's another review from Two Thirsty Gardeners: Sarah Coomer's Guest Review: The Big Allotment Challenge.

The Big Allotment Challenge seeks contestants - are you brave enough?

Last year, a flurry of excitement greeted the news that a Great British Bake-Off take-off would appear this year, centred on growing veg.

Well, with a series queued up for spring 2014, I can report the engine is revving for another series. Davinia Richardson, of Silver River Productions has been in touch to ask for help in their search for contestants.

Do you fancy a go? 

If so, you'll be given a patch in a walled garden in Oxfordshire and, over several months, plan, sow and grow your vegetables and flowers (the seeds are provided). Every week you'll visit your allotment and make sure all is OK. Filming starts when the growing gets going. Contestants will face challenges that test their creativity and culinary skills - jam-making and flower-arranging are mentioned - or they may, for example, have to produce their three best carrots to stay in the game.

The six-week series, fronted by Fern Britton features Jim Buttress, RHS judge (pictured, and tipped, according to the Daily Mail, as "the Paul Hollywood" of the series), floral designer Jonathan Moseley, and cookery writer Thane Prince. Each episode will, says the BBC, "reflect the growing season and what's ripe for picking at the time" and in each episode one team will "hang up their gardening gloves" and leave.

 

And, of course, there's a book. According to The Bookseller,  The Patch: The Big Allotment Challenge, with A-Z of easy veg, fruit and flowers, as well as instructions for making jam, preserves and easy flower arrangements) is due for publication this April.

One of the scarier aspects, to me, is that they're currently looking for individuals (though all the talk is of teams and Davinia explained there is space on the application form to say who you'd like to bring with you if the opportunity arises). 

I'm certainly not the only one who can see pitfalls looming large as sinkholes. Sue Garrett's post at Green Lane Allotments has gathered a chorus of experienced gardeners who admit to being too fearful to take part. 

But we're all definitely looking forward to watching. Horticulture holds its breath. Editor of Horticulture Week, Matthew Appleby has been quoted as saying that the industry is hoping this will create a "boom time" for gardening in the manner of the industry-venerated Ground Force.

Complete novices need not apply. Everyone must be an amateur grower, says Davinia, but they do need to know what they're doing. (Which makes the ad's reference to a "window box" a bit whimsical.) If you have any questions, then Davinia is happy to help. Give her a ring on 0207 907 3401. Deadline for applications is 12pm, 13th March.

So, do you fancy being the next Ruby Tandoh? (She now writes regularly in The Guardian.) Is it going to be you? Oh, go on, aim for stardom and apply.

NB More comment can be found over at Garden Clickers.

 

Berlin, bare branches and the Botanical Garden Part 1

While gardeners in the UK were beginning to enjoy the new season, Husband and I managed to extend winter by almost a week. In Berlin. Not everyone's choice of holiday destination, but it does happen to have one of the world's largest botanical gardens.

Not that that's why we went. Hubs has been itching to visit, having overcome his anxiety, born of too many black and white movies, that he might be arrested and tortured into betraying his underground contacts.

It's easy to overdo the grim stuff. Berlin's recent history is not hidden. The Haus am Checkpoint Charlie, the Topographie des Terrors (Germany under National Socialism), and the enormous Holocaust Memorial were quite enough for one day. When the Stasi Museum appeared on the Things To Do list, I pleaded depression and regained my equilibrium with a concentrated diet of superb paintings (Gemaldemuseum), fascinating architecture (Bundestag) and excellent sausages (everywhere).

Unfortunately spring is even later than it is here (it must always be a bit behind us), and with everything brown, tired or downright dead, it reminded me of the garden of Oscar Wilde's Selfish Giant, where winter never left. There were even heaps of snow in dank, forgotten corners.

Gardening and greenery are just waiting to burst out, though. Our first inkling flashed past us on the way from the airport (no chance for photos). What looked like a very neat shanty town, with various dwellings and sharply delineated plots, was a Kleingarten, a considerably less shambolic version of our allotments. (Ben Knight gives a lovely flavour of Berlin Kleingartens, which comprise over 3% of the city's area, and Sarah Webb describes the serious business of getting a Kleingarten hedge right in Bremen.) And the birdsong that greeted us every day as we left our very centrally placed hotel on Friedrichstrasse was what first alerted me to the fact that there was more nature in the city than was apparent.

Here's some of what we found:

Display of gardening items in the Galeries Lafayette, a shopping centre so gorgeous that even I almost wanted to shop!

A Patrick Blanc "Mur Vegetal", setting off an unexpected sphinx in the Dussmann das Kulturkaufhaus bookshop.

Might have had a coffee here, but it was closed for a private do. Gardening Jules was there at the same time and has some lovely photos.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Dwarfed by their surroundings, two beehives on top of the Berliner Dom (German Baroque - OK, but not worth the entrance fee, especially if you love Roman Baroque). Part of the Berlin is Buzzing campaign to create "a functioning urban nature and the conservation of ecosystems...and train young beekeepers".

Garden outside the Bauhaus Archiv, Berlin, April 2013

The garden outside the Bauhaus Archiv was sadly brown, tired and dusty. Bauhaus theory for Mies van der Rohe's one-storey court houses decreed that "floor area of the house and surface area of the plot had to form a harmonious relationship, with garden design and planting contributing to it. Garden plan and the interior arrangement of the house had to be interrelated, the views from the often large windows exactly calculated for near, middle and distance vision." This obviously wasn't meant to be a demonstration.

Bare branches weren't all bad. It was easy to see the enormous amount of mistletoe that grows around the city. Here it's outside the Neue Nationalgalerie, with Henry Moore's The Archer.

From fleece-wearing weather it turned in a week to 25 degrees, bringing a hint of green to city trees and the start of spring to the Botanical Garden. More in Part 2.

Christmas Gifts for Gardeners at the Country Living Fair

Last week I visited the Country Living Christmas Fair – all in the cause of research, you understand.

It’s a long-standing annual event at the Business Design Centre, Islington, and, never having been before, I was totally unprepared for its vast size and the enormous number of stands selling everything from clothing and food to soap and calligraphy.

Naturally, I kept a sharp look-out for anything gardening-related.

Kate Chidley produces fun illustrations, many of cows and sheep enjoying human activity. The print that caught my eye was The Good Life, the "Cowtoon" (ouch!) pictured, set on an allotment, and available in different sizes at around £25. 

A charm bracelet was certainly something I'd have adored as a child, and a grown-up version could include some of the cute gardening charms from Scarlett Jewellery. They also sell a variety of suitable bracelets. Of course, you could buy them all at once, but at around £35 per charm, starting a bracelet could to tide you over in the present-giving department for several years.

Staying with jewellery, Michael Michaud uses bronze, silver and gold to creates rather gorgeous necklaces and pendants based on flowers, fruit and, my favourite, beans and peas.

Finally, Joanna Smith-Ryland creates rather lovely cushions and bags in silk patchwork. Her Garden Collection features Cathedral Window patchwork embellished with embroidered flowers and butterflies. They're not cheap, but they are gorgeously sumptuous and you could commission anything from a bedspread to a waistcoat in the material.

To enjoy a similar design in pink at a more everyday price, you could plump for her Garden Collection cotton tablemats which are printed with the silk design. A set of six costs £38 and is machine washable.

Another Country Living Christmas Fair is taking place in Glasglow 17-20th November.

Allotment growers emerge blinking into spring

As activity at the allotment cranks up, have you seen these characters?

“The species allotment growers and its two sub groups: allyearroundi (seen every month of the year, harvesting in any weather),and hibernatei (finishes in October,clears the ground and reappears the next year).

"Spring is close because hibernatei has been sighted,wearing the Christmas present of new gloves. (What else do you give an allotment holder?)

"Contemplating the patch that had been left clean but is now growing weeds and covered with leaves,hibernatei faces its first big decision of the year. Which essential tool to use first – spade, fork, hoe or thermos flask? That initial decision determines the remainder of your season. It is imperative to make the right choice as a stewed thermos of tea or coffee can ruin everything.”

Well, it certainly made me giggle. Over at the Horsell Allotments, Chairman David Inns writes the allotment blog for the Woking News and Mail. It’s well worth following, not just for his wit. He’s currently conducting an experiment to see whether fresh chicken manure will help in combating club root in his brassicas. (Note: follow David's blog at a new address from March 2010)

Skipping the Allotments means a fight for Fortis Green

The Government is so keen for us to Grow Our Own that we are to be encouraged to grow vegetables in skips, according to an article by Louise Gray in the Daily Telegraph yesterday.

The idea is that the Government will set up a national “land bank” so that you and I can find the nearest piece of public or private land available to start sowing and reaping. Land would be available at hospitals, car parks, schools and on development sites where food could be grown in skips and moved about, presumably as the housing estates go up around them.

Am I the only one that thinks there’s something odd going on? Anyone would think there was a war on. Are we expecting one? Indeed, John Denham, the Communities Secretary, likened the plans to the wartime Dig for Victory campaign. Does the Government know something we don’t?

Creating an allotment: Doctor knows best

Allotments are hot property these days. If you’re thinking of taking one on and are lucky enough to live in an area where there isn’t a waiting list, then you should get going now. You’ll need the winter to prepare the plot in time for spring sowing.

The best websites make no bones about the work involved. Dr George Cook- a GP with fifty years’ gardening experience – has an allotment in Liverpool which he transformed in only seven months (though, having it almost on his doorstep must have helped).

Last month the Liverpool Federation for Allotment and Leisure Gardeners* awarded him Third Place for the Best Plot in Liverpool 2009. His allotment website includes loads of information, including a thought-provoking monthly breakdown of the hours spent working it (a hefty 78 hours in June, only 5 in December). When I first visited over a year ago, he’d included the sobering calculation that a standard plot takes ten thousand turns of the spade to dig over and added, “the basic requirement…is exercise and commitment. If you are afraid of these, then try knitting.”

Giant Onions

Can any veg grower resist a peek at someone else’s plot? Not me. I actually grazed the underside of my nose last year, straining to poke it over a fence for an eyeful of a stranger’s asparagus.

If you have an allotment, you have ample opportunity to ogle the competition, but for those of us who don’t and who find that Next Door is a desert of lawn and plastic toys, it can be difficult to work out if it’s you, or if this really is a bad year for leeks.